I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
