what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
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