So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
