you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
