your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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