your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
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