nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
