Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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