I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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