try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
