i may or may not be watching the land before time
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
