So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Randomize