If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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