I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
