i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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