Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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