just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
