i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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