i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
