You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Randomize
