Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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