so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
