I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
