yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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