This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
He told me they were just razor bumps!
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
