Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
