help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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