Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Randomize
