imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Randomize