oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
