Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize