Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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