Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
