Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
