left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
i've created a new STD.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize