i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
