I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize
