I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Randomize
