i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Randomize
