So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
