Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
