you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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