Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
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