hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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