covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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