Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
We are all done wearing pants today
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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