You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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