true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
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