Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
