He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
